Traveling Back in Time

Technologically speaking, I consider myself fairly up to date. I email, I blog (duh), I facebook, I text and use my iPhone for everything, but I am resisting the pull of the electronic reader. Oh, I certainly can see the attraction of the Nook or Kindle, the convenience, no more shoving four books in my suitcase for a week at the beach. I get that. You know what my problem is? I'll admit it...I am in love with the library. There, I've said it. I am in LOVE with the library. I can go online and place books on hold and when they are available, the library will text me! I can get free DVD rentals (three week rentals!) and although the DVD selection ain't no Netflix, it's a good Netflix backup and they have a lot of older movies that are fantastic. Do you remember Bookmobiles? I loved those. They brought the books...TO ME!! As a child, I was no stranger to the library. My Mother used to take us there and we'd be allowed to choose three books at a time. I think we usually did that in the summer. Probably my favorite perk of the library is the cost. It's absolutely free! I get the most amazing feeling when I walk out through those cool double doors, my arms full of new books and movies and I didn't spend a dime. And if I start to read a book and don't like it, I slide that baby right back into the chute, guilt-free. I gotta go read now. :)

Things I Learned From Charlie's Angels

Once upon a time, there were three little girls who went to the Police Academy... As a female product of a 70s childhood, I wanted to be one of Charlie's Angels when I grew up (yes, I know I've told you that I wanted to be the Bain de Soleil lady, but that was later. For the record I also wanted to be Barbie and Iris Love). I had the Farrah 'do (I think that was mandated by law in suburban Tulsa, OK circa 1977-79) and I had the green bikini that looked just like Jaclyn's white one. Oh, yes...I had it all. I recently watched an old episode of Charlie's Angels and it was fantastic in it's ghastly campiness. It made me quite nostalgic for my childhood, especially since the Angels went undercover on a cruise on this episode, which kind of made it a cross between Charlie's Angels AND the Love Boat and if you could have thrown in some little guy yelling 'Da Plane, Da Plane!', too, well let's just say I would've been in heaven. And I realized as I watched that there were an abundance of lessons I learned from Charlies Angels. Maybe because this show hails from an era of after-school-specials or maybe because I'd had a glass of wine, I'm not sure. Let me recap. 1) A swift Karate chop to a bad guy works every time. I don't know how and I've never done it, but I'm pretty sure that I could or at least that I'd like to, given the chance. 2) If you're the smart one (Sabrina), you don't get to wear the low cut, super sexy outfits. And you are stuck forever with that 'smart' label and it doesn't matter if Farrah leaves the show and they bring in that scrawny little Cheryl Ladd, you STILL don't get bumped up to sexy stuff. Sad. Turtleneck? Why can't she wear the cool off the shoulder number like Jaclyn? And look at the pic at the top. A bikini....short shorts....and covered head to toe in wth...riding johdpurs?! Left to right: Covered up like a nun, hot, sexy. And finally...the same fabric, but Kate's dress is cut up to her chin. 3) There are basically four kinds of guys. a) the bad ones who want to kidnap you. b) the polite ones who refer to you as 'Miss' and are usually a step beneath you socially like a waiter or a cabin boy. c) The ones who call, but never show up and d) Bosley. 4) We all have to be whores sometimes. Of course, the Angels had to go undercover as whores, well not really whores because this was prime time tv in the 70s, so more like sexy magician's assistants or a cocktail waitress, anything in a skimpy costume. I had to dress up once in a Lieutenant Uhura Star Trek dress for a convention (it was a space themed convention!! Seriously, I'm NO trekkie. Give me a little credit) and every day I dress up in pretty clothes and go do things that I don't necessarily enjoy and I get paid for it. Anyway...the lesson is just roll your eyes and roll with it. 5) When you're really in serious trouble, just hang tight and your girlfriends will come to the rescue. If you can kind of halfway collapse in a seductive, helpless posture all the better. 6) Above all, stay glossed and perfectly feathered at all times. Especially when halfway collapsed. I have noticed that jumpsuits are back in style and I saw some luscious 70s wooden platform heels at Target last week. I bet I could pull out my curling iron and do a feathered do and then KARATE CHOP!!! Didn't see that coming, did you? See? It works.

Sh*t My Mom Says

Do you remember all those things your 'Mother always said'? Here are the things I tell my kids: 1) "Life isn't fair. Nobody told you it would be. I was there when you were born and nobody said 'Welcome to the world! It's fair here!'." 2) To my teenage son when he started driving "Rule number one : Remember that all other drivers are crazy and trying to kill you" and 3) "Be home by midnight. The only things open after midnight are Emergency Rooms and legs. You don't need to be in either." 4) "Always be nice to the nerdy-brainy kids. They're usually nice, and you may need to work for them someday." 5) This one is nightly: "Dinner's ready! Get your own drink. I'm a cook, not a cocktail waitress." In summary, be careful, don't get anyone pregnant, be nice, don't whine and don't expect me to serve you. Wow...I'm deep.

Delusions of Sugar Plums Dance in My Head

I'm uncertain what it is about this time of year, but I always get delusional somewhere shortly after Thanksgiving. Maybe it's the beautiful Christmas displays in shop windows, maybe it's an overload of sugar lingering in my veins from the Pumpkin pie or maybe it's simply the arrival of cold weather that has frozen my brain. Whatever it is, it settles on me like an overnight dusting of Texas snow...it's CHRISTMAS DELUSION SYNDROME. I imagine myself about a week prior to the Christmas holiday, lounging on the couch in my black silk robe, sipping a cup of Kahlua spiked hot chocolate and admiring the festive surroundings of my holiday decorated (and clean) home while Christmas Carols play softly on the surround sound system. A fire is ablaze in the fireplace, the gifts are not only wrapped and under the tree, but properly tagged and within my set budget. I am leisurely leafing through a cookbook, deciding on what to lovingly create for the holiday meal. And even as I write this, I know it's insane. Oh, trust me...I know. But let me have my delusional perfection (did I mention that I look extremely thin and young as I am lounging on that couch?) because that dream? Probably not going to happen.

Secrets of Men at the Grocery Store-Revealed

As far as I can tell, men at the grocery store can basically be divided into three distinct categories. I have come to this conclusion because I spend an extraordinary amount of time there, let me tell you. All of the people at my local store know me, partly because my son works there and partly because they think I live back in a corner of the stockroom. Actually it may have been that big grape juice spill on aisle 10, but I digress. 1) Errand Boy for the Mrs. These men can easily be spotted by the cell phone glued to their ear and a wildy overwhelmed look in their eye. They have ventured into a strange land and are afraid to bring back the wrong thing. I've even seen one on the phone at the check out asking "Honey, paper or plastic?". I would categorize these men as more 'hunters' than 'gatherers'. 2) Lost Boys - These guys are lost, too, but instead of calling home, they ask random women at the store for directions. I have learned a lot about how people view me from these men and obviously, I look like a woman who knows where the Velveeta motherlode is kept. I've also been asked how to cook things and 'my wife sent me to get X, is this it?'. Being a good sport as well as a Grocery Goddess (Hell, I live there!), I always help them out. Kudos to them for asking directions. I know it's hard. 3. Man About Town - This man not only knows his way around the grocery store, but you can tell by the contents of his cart that he's got moves that put my cooking skills to shame. This, my Dear, is the man that you dream will say, "I would love to cook for you". The downside? He usually has another guy with him. BONUS GROCERY GUY: 'Mr. Friday Night' - He's a bonus category because he's like a super shopper special - only available for a limited time. I very rarely go to the store on Friday nights, but have had occasion to run by and pick up a few things. And I do mean 'pick up'. I had no idea, but apparantly (in my area) Friday night is Singles Night!! They're everywhere - nice looking men with shopping carts full of beer and frozen pizzas and that 'how YOU doin' look in their eyes. I counted once and had five guys said 'hello' to me. So, all you single ladies out there...now you know where they are. Get thee to a grocery store on a Friday evening! Since I'm happily married, I figured I'd pass this info on because I'm nice like that.

Best Friend ~ Country Style!

My friend, Dale, and I have so much fun together. We are both 'artsy' and like to create things and we've even done a couple of ill fated art shows together. (It wasn't OUR fault that it rained/the temperature dropped 50 degrees/people didn't 'get' our art). We hang out at the pool in the summer and pretend to be on a tropical isle. We go to Watter's Creek and shop, drink and dine while scattering glitter throughout. We get together with our families and have Saturday night dinners. We laugh a lot. One of the weirdest things we do is talk 'country style'. You know, like hillbillies (which comes frighteningly natural to us both). She and her daughter and her sister started it and for some reason it really amuses us. So, you can imagine how excited I was last weekend when Dale presented me with the 'Best Country Style Friend' award. I should have had an acceptance speech ready, oh, I know I should've. But all I could do is laugh. And drink more moonshine. Love you, Dale (Country Style)!!!!!

Fall - Don't be sucked in. It's only a gateway to Winter

I used to really like Fall when I was a kid. The smell of new spirals, Halloween, crisp air and a new school year full of new possibilities (the possibility of new cute boys in my class?) Mind you, I said 'like', not 'love'. The main problem with Fall is that it is followed closely by winter. If you look up 'Fall' in the dictionary, you will see these definitions, among others: 'To become lower in degree or level' 'To drop down wounded or dead' These things are not good. The longer I am here on earth, the more I love summer and warmth rather than winter. The only good things about Winter, as far as I'm concerned are as follows: 1) Boots 2) Christmas (annual 'Bitchmas' party included) 3) GIRL TRIP 4) Romantic fireside picnics in the living room 5) My slow cooker Really...that's all I can think of. Thankfully, I live in an area that sees warm weather until Thanksgiving, so my suffering is not long. But, I am always sad to see the Fall decorations and pumpkins out at the store because that means the official end of Summer. And I am most definitely a Summer Girl.

Straight Jacket Required

I've always been pretty laid back (except for those couple of days a month when I'm licensed to kill) but lately I've felt exceedingly bitchy, anxious, sad for no reason sometimes - and not in a good way. When I think of something I need to get done, I feel compelled to DO IT RIGHT NOW so that I don't forget and end up with a bunch of half finished projects in the works and then I get overwhelmed. What is wrong with me? Am I going crazy? (she wondered....loudly, and how would I look in a straightjacket? Would I get to meet Mel Gibson if I were committed? Would I get some rest?) This morning I googled 'symptoms of menopause', and you guessed it-there was a picture of me! What's a nice girl like me doing in a place like this?!? Now if you're squeamish or would care to be able to honestly reply with "I seriously had no idea, Officer" at any point in the future, I would suggest you stop reading now and go on your merry little way. You've been warned. Here's what I found that pertained to me on a huge list: Irritability (ummm, yes. Much, mucho, grande. There are people tied up in my backyard and "I am in no mood!" is my mantra) Mood Swings, Sudden Tears (I often shower the tied up people with cupcakes and hugs) Crashing Fatigue (yes!) Anxiety, feeling ill at ease Feelings of dread, apprehension, doom Difficulty concentrating, disorientation, mental confusion Disturbing memory lapses (could be from drinking tho, JUST KIDDING!!!) Headaches Increase in allergies (my eyes are so swollen today that Chloe asked for a pedicure) Gastrointestinal issues, bloating - this one was actually good news, as I thought I was fat, but am pleased to know that I'm only bloated Problems sleeping (and weird doomlike dreams) Breast tenderness (I swear I thougth I was pregnant earlier this week) There were many symptoms that were on the list that I do not suffer from (knock on wood) and pray not to. I'll admit that I was always one to play the hormone card to my advantage. Male teachers and bosses (the smart ones, anyway) are easily put off with phrases like "I need to go home...it's a female thing". I used to claim "M"- which you guessed it, stood for Menstruation, as an excuse not to swim in Jr. High PE. My real excuse was that the Nazi issue swimwear and oil of a thousand teenagers floating on top of the pool was enough to make me hurl. My insurance paid for Endometrial Ablation a few years ago (and if you're female, look into that! Burn off your uterine lining and no more monthly visits from Aunt Flo. I had one tiny cramp after the out patient procedure and got to lay around and take Vicodin for three days, so it's a win/win thing). My point being (Difficulty concentrating, disorientation, mental confusion) that I don't think that I'm just making this up! I really thought that maybe I was starting to go a little crazy, but then I remembered that crazy people aren't usually as bitchy as I am. Or maybe it's just karma coming back to bite me in the ass for using hormones as an excuse all those years. I don't seem to be really crazy in a BAD way. It's more of a 'Hey-lets-drop-everything-and-go-to-Vegas' thing or 'Ice-cream-is-perfectly-acceptable-for-dinner' thing. So, there is an element of fun about some of it. I'm holding on and keeping all my arms and legs safely inside the car for a ride that's sure to be fun. To add to the adventure, it looks like my daughter and I will be headed in opposite directions through the same land at the same time. Let's meet for lunch. If we could harness that power, however, I believe we could take over the world and I've started shopping for an Evil Lair. This one might work well when the hot flashes come.

Summertime

Ahh...Summertime in the 70s. On the last day of school you cleaned out your locker (mine always had a bunch of trash and jackets stuffed in the bottom of it) waved bye bye to school and headed off to paradise. Summer stretched out endlessly...three whole months of "no more school, no more books, no more teachers dirty looks". I spent almost all of my summers at the Park Plaza community pool in Tulsa, Oklahoma, where I grew up. We'd go there in the morning, come home for lunch, go back to the pool, come home for dinner, go back to the pool, come home and sleep. I can still smell that sharp scent of chlorine and hear the sounds of mid 70s music playing from the speaker at the pool. "Everybody was Kung Fu Fighting" and "Listen to What the Man Says" come to mind. We never wore sunblock (this is back when we had an ozone layer) and would pool our money and go to Git n Go for candy or a Koolie, or possibly even to Braum's for some french fries. The worst part by far was the adult swim. I mean seriously! We would sit right on the edge of the pool, our feet dangling in the water so that at least some part of our body was still in contact with our aqua diety. The adults (all two of them) didn't even look like they were having fun! I mean, they didn't get their hair wet or go on the slide! Every once in a while, some kid would go a little too far trying to stick his feet in the pool and accidentally slip in the water during the adult swim, only to scramble out, half shamed, half hero. When we weren't at the pool, we'd just play games with all of the neighborhhood kids. Capture the Flag, Sardines, anything we could think of. The Helander's house up the street and the Clemensen's house didn't have back yard fences and were right next door to each other, providing the perfect field of play. Sometimes we made up plays or musicals and charged our parents a nickle to come watch us. Lauren's back porch made the best venue for that. We girls also used to camp out in Lauren's back yard in tents. It was always a little creepy for me because they'd zip up the tent and I'd get claustrophobic. But it was fun. We wouldn't come home until past dark. Some kids were called in by a whistle, some were told to come home 'when the streetlights came on'. Another thing I remember is that we never seemed to wear shoes. Oh, we had shoes. We'd go to Kmart at the beginning of summer and buy these Asian looking flip flops, which we called jap-flaps. (Hey, it was the Age of Aquarius, not of Political Correctness) but we rarely even wore those. By the end of summer I think I was an inch taller, just from the thick calluses on the soles of my feet. I could walk on hot asphalt all day! Hell, I could've walked on broken glass! So, here's to Summer! Still my favorite season. Long evenings, green grass and sparkling blue pools. Adult Swim? Bring it on!

My Big Adventure

Today I was almost in a car wreck, I was sprayed by oil from a World War II Army plane and I broke a heel. This is what happens when I leave my office and go on client visits! First visit was a Flight Museum. Cool place. Hangars full of Viet Nam and WW II era planes, old cars (even a Delorean -- I wanted to get in and get it up to 88, well of course I did). We got to watch as they started up a World War II era Army plane and took off. The CEO and some board members were going to Ft. Worth for a meeting. Yea...because we all get to go to meetings like that! It splattered oil all over my nice white blouse. Hopefully, it will wash out. This is the underside of the wing of a plane. So pretty!! This is the one they flew to a meeting! Next stop was an insurance company...and then wayyyy up North to a company that makes antimicrobial soil additives and fertilizers. We got to tour their lab. Kinda cool. On to Denton, where a woman in a big SUV decided to turn left in front of me. Thankfully, my car has a great braking system, and I ended up stopping about six inches short of slamming into her. We spotted an old Piggly Wiggly! It was an exciting day and guess what? Tomorrow I'm off to Grand Prairie, Ft. Worth and Grapevine. I wish I could go in an Army plane.

Update on the Sixth Floor Parking Garage

Okay...I know that you've been on pins and needles. It seems that Edward is probably either a) not really sleeping in his car or b) an extremely neat and tidy vampire boy. The blankets/quilts are still there, but I notice they are nicely folded and stacked and look the same each day. You draw your own conclusion. It's more fun that way. And now, Moongrl salutes the "Real Men of Genius" Today, we salute you, "Mr. My Car's an Instant Nightclub" Any man can go out to a nightclub, but it takes a Real Man of Genius to create his own nightclub environment in a parking garage. Standing there, like a babe magnet, you open your car doors and blast your music while smoking a cigarette and instantly, magically, the bland grey cement is transformed into a swanky, sexy cocktail lounge. Takin' the occasional phone call (Yeah, Babe....sorry. I've been busy) and pacing in the little area next to the handicapped space like a caged animal (Grrrr!), as you watch the girls click by in their heels, you are James Bond cool. "A dirty martini? Why, yes, I've got a wet bar in my trunk." So, crack open a Bud Light, "Mr. My Car's an Instant Nightclub" Guy, who has it all. Except a friend to hang out with. (Thanks to Jack for his help with that last line) Hopefully, I'll get a video of the lady who uses her turn signal all the way down the parking garage spiral, even though there's only one way you can turn!!

Strange Happenings on the 6th Floor

The parking garage at my office (which I fondly refer to as 'The Deathtrap' - drive through it once and you'll see why) is an interesting place. It's a nice little petri dish of people for people watching and oh, do I love to people watch. You can sit me down on the Strip in Vegas and I'm happy for hours. I can even make up entire stories about people, which takes people watching to a whole new level. But I digress. Edward Cullen parks near me on the 6th floor of the parking garage. I park up that high so as to stay away from other cars and avoid door dings on my pretty Benz. Edward parks up there because he's cool like that. I call him Edward because, like the Twilight character, he's young, he has the rumpled, just rolled out of bed look and he wears some pretty edgy clothes. His black military style jacket is my fave. He kind of looks like Nutcracker Vampire Boy in it. The thing that fascinates me is Edward's car. On first inspection, it's just a late model, silver Volkswagen sedan. But if you watch, there are some weird goings on here. During Christmas there were two plates in the rear window ledge covered in foil. Something that his Grandma sent home with him and he forgot to take inside and put in the frig? That's an easy explanation, you say. Except they stayed there, in the car for about three weeks!! Ewwww. Now his back seat is full of blankets and quilts. And today I left the office around 4:00 and Edward was walking back inside, hair duly rumpled (well...isn't it always). I wondered if he'd been napping in his car. Is there something hidden underneath? Is he living in his car? Did he finally eat the food under the foil? And the most important question...why do I care??? I have no idea. Up soon - the 'my life's a party and I want to share my music' dude.

The Cure for PMS

This was actually discovered by myself and my BFF Miss Pamela on a weekend spent on Mustang Island many, many moons ago. I have absolutely no scientific proof that it works, but I still swear by it. I don't remember which of us was truly suffering that weekend, but I think it was Pam and I was just crabby because my Xman was there. So, here ya go! The reason that this has eluded medical science is because it is a combination of several things: One Aleve pill One large Strawberry daiquiri (you could probably substitute another cocktail, but make sure it's choc full of sugar and liquor) Two or Three pieces of good quality chocolate Nacho Cheese Doritos (Spicy or Regular) A shoulder/neck massage Repeat as needed. Be sure to save receipts for medical tax deduction. Seriously....it works!

Long Eyelashes - almost free!

You've seen the ads for prescriptions eyelash serums and eyelash extensions. I just haven't had the inclination to go there. One day, right before Christmas, I was loitering at Macy's (waiting around to pick up Chloe from something) and I wandered over to the Benefit cosmetics counter. I needed something, I don't remember what. The Benefit girls must have been bored because they started trying cosmetics on me and the discussion turned to mascara. "I like waterproof mascara because I don't end up with raccoon eyes", I said. (What I didn't add was that I use the cheap stuff, Maybellene-gasp) The Benefit girls then informed me that waterproof mascara ruins your eyelashes, makes them brittle and they break off and, one of them added "If you stop using it and use regular mascara for a few months, I guarantee you that your lashes will be much, much longer". Well, guess what?? It worked. I also rub a tiny amount of moisturizer into them at night along with moisturizing my face. Check it out: (yes I have on mascara here, but they are much longer. Should've done a before pic)

Relationship Rules - Dating

I'm not a therapist, and I don't even play one on tv, but a recent discussion amongst friends has prompted me to write this. I'll call it 'My Rules of Dating'. Take it for what it's worth - it's really just good common sense. I feel this advice pertains to both men and women, so I will use 'he' and 'she' in my points. 1) Never, ever, ever expect that he will change. If he is an alcoholic, emotional infant, liar, cheater, abuser there is no way in hell that your love will change him. Sure, who didn't want to own a beautiful horse (or wolf dog or whatever!) that would hate everyone, but only love us because 'our love was that pure'? WHEN WE WERE TEN YEARS OLD!!!! Get over that one right now. When you are dating someone, they should be behaving at their best and if that sucks....hit the road. Leave no forwarding address. 2) You should have a sense of who YOU are and what you want. Last time around in the dating pool I knew pretty much what I was looking for. Someone cool, laid back, easy going and no golfing. But you've got to know who YOU are in order to know what you want. You can't look to another person or a relationship to complete you. If you are whole and independent, happy and well adjusted, you will attract the right kind of partner. Anything less is unacceptable. If you have a gut feeling that something is wrong....it usually is. Trust your gut as much as your heart. 3) No cohabitation. You are just setting yourself up for trouble. If you have kids - it sets a bad example and if you end up breaking up, it's a huge mess. If you are going to cohabitate, you should have some sort of commitment. If you don't, ask yourself why you don't. At a minimum, have a ring on your finger and a date on the calendar. 4) Psych 101 tells us that we humans tend to choose partners who have the same bad personality traits as the primary caregiver that we had as a child. Alcoholic Dad? You could be drawn to alcoholic men. Mom is passive agressive? So's your girlfriend. Get the picture? Be aware of this. I'm just sayin'. 5) Women (especially) for God's sake, men cannot read our minds! Mostly, they can't even hit the toilet, so stop torturing yourself. It goes something like this Man: Honey, I'm going out with the boys tonite Woman: Fine Then when he returns, he is punished for it for days. Seriously, say what you mean and mean what you say. Don't be a mystery. And think about it this way - If you ask for what you want, you have a much better chance of getting it. It's called being honest with yourself and others. 6) Fight Fair - don't yell, curse and act like a baby. I can promise you that it will get you absolutely nowhere. Talk about your issues and try to see the other person's side. Don't pull up stuff from the past, don't accuse. Stay calm. 7) Know when to cut bait. Seriously. Don't hang onto an unsatisfying relationship that you know has no chance of working out. How is that helping you or the other person in the relationship? Best of luck! That'll be $80, please.

Touched by a Rainbow

I was driving home from work today in typical Dallas rush hour traffic. It was a dreary, rainy Monday, I was on the third day of an annoying cold and I was in, as they say, no mood. Out of nowhere, a rainbow appeared up in front of me and to the right. It was extremely vivid and large and I could see both ends of it. The rain began to let up. The traffic on Central Expressway created a great cloud of mist right above the road and as I marveled at the unexpected beauty of the rainbow, it hit the road and refracted and came right into my car for about two seconds! It was magnificent! I had been touched by a rainbow! When I exited the highway, the rainbow was so large on the horizon that it looked like a colorful skyscraper. Violet, Green, Yellow, Orange...the distinction and brightness of the colors was utterly amazing. It was then I noticed that it that it was a double rainbow. By the time I sped home, grabbed my camera and drove across the street to the farm, all that was left was a few drops of color. I sat on the little road and took a picture as I watched the colors fade and then disappear. What an extraordinary sight. This is the shot I got: But it looked more like this:

Let it snow, let it snow...okay stop already

Dallas broke a record today for snowfall. We had 12 1/2 inches of snow. Pretty amazing for Texas. I'm not really crazy about the snow, because I'm really not a winter person. Give me summer, give me a beach. But it really was pretty. School was out, but I had to work. Because I'm dedicated like that. Or because my boss told me to. :( After work I drove around and took pics of the local snowpeople. As always, kids can't go to school, but they can play outside in it all day. I remember going outside in it until my hands and feet were numb. We'd go inside and sit in front of a fire and Mom would put our wet cold clothes in the dryer and make us hot chocolate. Then, we'd do it all over again! Sledding at Shadow Mountain was the best. Gerald got to be on hot chocolate duty today and my ex husband even came over to play with the kids. Chloe and Marissa Chloe's Snowman, obviously the best The kids had a blast at the park down the street MavsMan Snowman Snow Beast - very cool! These two look like they're mad at each other The Dirty Duo Excellent use of a Happy New Year Tiara Pretty in Pink Super cute face decor Love the Hat Santa!!!!! I know him! Hopefully it will all be gone by the end of the weekend and Spring will come soon. My flip flops are mocking me as they sit, abandoned in my closet. Until then, I guess it's time to snuggle up and watch the winter Olympics.

Adventures in Aging ~ Exodus from the Land of Denial

So, I took a huge step this morning and went in for my annual eye exam...well, not really annual but I don't know what the word is for 'once every ten years'. Let me start from the beginning... When I was in first grade, I got my first pair of glasses. Wow! I could see! The problem was, everyone could see me, too. Let's just say that glasses in 1971 weren't all that attractive so there I was. A skinny little awkward kid with stringy brown hair and big nerdy tortoise shell glasses. (Cue downward spiral of self esteem) In junior high, I just went on strike and quit wearing them (Cue downward spiral of grades) and then I got contacts at about the same time that I got boobs and things literally began looking up. Ten years ago I popped for LASIK surgery. Lo and behold! I could see without the mess and fuss of contacts! (Wow, my shower is dirty). I was beyond thrilled to go to the beach with no contacts and be able to read. Over the last couple of years I've been noticing that the writing on Tylenol bottles has gotten much smaller and kinda fuzzy (damn Tylenol) and recently a client walked in my office and commented about me squinting at my computer screen, which is relatively the size of an IMAX screen. Hmmm...driving at night is bad, too. Sigh. I called my eye doctor (remember me?) and made an appointment. The lady on the phone mentioned the word 'bifocals'! GASP! "I am not THAT far out of denial", I told her. Turns out I did get away without bifocals, but only because 'we have options'. God, I love options. By Wednesday I will be the proud owner of a new pair of reading/computer glasses and a pair of distance glasses (for night driving, theater, tv). IN YOUR FACE BIFOCALS!!! Neither of which are big clunky tortoise shell. I have this theory though, that age related eye degeneration is some cosmic attempt at kindness. I mean, have you ever looked at the wrinkles around your eyes in full and direct sunlight? Exactly, me neither. So, I'm not sure what other exciting things I'll find when I get my new glasses, but at least I did it and I'll be a safer night driver. One way ticket out of the Land of Denial? $500. Which is kind of sad, because I really enjoyed my stay there.

Spring - Southern Living

I don't necessarily have the greenest of thumbs, but I like to plant a few herbs to use in the kitchen. This year I have planted mostly basil, because I love to use it to make lemon basil pasta, Caprese salads and dress up a frozen Margherita pizza. I also planted some rosemary, which is nice on new potatoes. There is one little sad pot of Mint that survived the winter (barely) indoors and I'm hoping it will come back soon to be morphed into Mint Tea or Mojitos. I have chives in my kitchen window that are very easy to grow. I feel very 'Southern Living' magazine when I use my own herbs for cooking. I love to cook when I have time and I'm inspired...which is not on weekdays after a 45 minute commute. This is my Clematis in the backyard. I planted it myself when I moved into this house about ten years ago. I have several mini roses. This pink bush is my favorite. I planted it by my front door because my Grandmother had a pink mini rose bush by her front door that I loved when I was a child.