Do you remember all those things your 'Mother always said'? Here are the things I tell my kids:
1) "Life isn't fair. Nobody told you it would be. I was there when you were born and nobody said 'Welcome to the world! It's fair here!'."
2) To my teenage son when he started driving "Rule number one : Remember that all other drivers are crazy and trying to kill you" and
3) "Be home by midnight. The only things open after midnight are Emergency Rooms and legs. You don't need to be in either."
4) "Always be nice to the nerdy-brainy kids. They're usually nice, and you may need to work for them someday."
5) This one is nightly: "Dinner's ready! Get your own drink. I'm a cook, not a cocktail waitress."
In summary, be careful, don't get anyone pregnant, be nice, don't whine and don't expect me to serve you. Wow...I'm deep.
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Sunday, January 9, 2011
Sh*t My Mom Says
Do you remember all those things your 'Mother always said'? Here are the things I tell my kids:
1) "Life isn't fair. Nobody told you it would be. I was there when you were born and nobody said 'Welcome to the world! It's fair here!'."
2) To my teenage son when he started driving "Rule number one : Remember that all other drivers are crazy and trying to kill you" and
3) "Be home by midnight. The only things open after midnight are Emergency Rooms and legs. You don't need to be in either."
4) "Always be nice to the nerdy-brainy kids. They're usually nice, and you may need to work for them someday."
5) This one is nightly: "Dinner's ready! Get your own drink. I'm a cook, not a cocktail waitress."
In summary, be careful, don't get anyone pregnant, be nice, don't whine and don't expect me to serve you. Wow...I'm deep.
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3 comments:
LMAO This would be a provocative discussion on The Vine. We could all add our parent's weird shit. I could write a freakin' book with my Scottish fairytales.
Also LMAO - so true! Love the first one especially.
I can SOOOO relate...love all your sayings. I raised three boys...and have the gray hair to prove it. (Although I have it highlighted now to hide it...haha!)
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